What the hell is this thing?
by Webdemon
Summary: Come inside...See who yells at Naruto the most! /evilsmile!


**What the hell is this?**

Something I cooked up just for the hell of it! I may as well avert to something else while I'm here! Okay guys! Let's get this over with! Oh if any of you were a fan of my lastest Naru/ikki stuff I got something in the making there too..The brand spanking new They are my noble masters and Naruto Crossover (I dumped the Omamori Himari cause I didn't know how I was going go about it...Nothing was coming to mind really. And if your really nice I "MIGHT" and I mean "MIGHT" after I am done with this one I will start on a final installment of the Naru / ikki series based in the previous one. I might even use more of the characters from the new Xtreme Xecutor series (Mind you so far so good..Almost done with it! Last episode is tomorrow.**) **Anyway I wanted to get that out of the way before I get through with this dialogue. For those about to read this you might want to prepare whatever seat your in...and if your actually doing just that your a bigger nerd that I thought :P.

Anyway enough ranting.

Let us begin shall we?

* * *

(Konohamaru walks into the room with a little white box. He is stopped by Sakura as she is curious as to what's in the box.)

Sakura: Hey Konohamaru.. What's in the box?

Konohamaru:Oh hi Sakura. You wanna see this neat thing I got in the mail today? I wanna show Naruto too**.**

(She takes a looks in the box to look at the object in question. Upon further she gasped and looks at Konohamaru.)

Sakura:What the hell is this thing? Just where did you get this?

Konohamaru: I got it in the mail!

Sakura: No I meant who did you get it from?

Konohamaru:I ordered it..Pretty cool huh?

Sakura: Konohamaru this is something for little kids to play with...It's something for teens or adults...

Konohamaru: No it's not. The catalog said 13 and up. I am 13 and I know how to use it.

Sakura: But it's looks...weird...almost alien.

Konohamaru: That's why I wanna show it to Naruto. Cause it's got this feature too**.**

Sakura:Well we better go to the tower. I know he's getting a royal bitching right now for putting tattoos on her face

Konohamaru:He did what?

Sakura:Don't ask...Let's just go.(in thought) _What the hell is that thing...it's like...something out of this world...It 's so...blah! I can't even begin to describe._

(They run into Hinata bringing groceries.)

Hinata:Hello you two...What's going on?

Konohamaru: I got this cool thing I brought from a catalog a while back. Wanna see it?

Hinata: Uhh...sure? (Takes a looks into the box and gasps.) Konohamaru where did you get this?

Konohamaru: From this catalog that Naruto gave me

Hinata:What the hell kind of catalog is it?

Konohamaru: I don't know what kind of catalog it is. I just ordered it and two weeks later and it came.

Hinata: (Blushing) But this thing...It's really...uumm...H-h-how do I s-say this without it coming out wrong...Are you sure this is something someone gave you?

Konohamaru:Aww come on! This is ridiculous! I mean you too. Sakura said it was weird too. It's not some wierd toy. Every kid has this!

Hinata: What?

Sakura: Konohamaru just how popular is this thing.

Konohamaru:I don't know but all I know is that a lot of other adults use it. Even my mom has one. She says it's better than my dad.

Sakura: Well...That's just sad isn't it.

Hinata:Yes it is...But to have this thing...it's ...soo...blah

Sakura; That's what I said.

Hinata: I know...but this thing...Is it even from around here?

Sakura: I don't think so. It looks like something out of this world if you ask me

Konohamaru:Look I'm gonna show Naruto this thing so let me out of the way

Hinata: You're...going...to see him

Konohamaru: Grr For fucks sake you wanna go?

Hinata:..yes? (In thought) _Jeez you don't have to be so rude!_

Konohamaru: Fine both of you come with me and we'll see that I am right all along.

(they go to the tower where Tsunade and Ino are inside discussing some important matters.)

Ino:So what I was thinking was that maybe we might split the teams up...Huh Sakura...What are you doing here?

Sakura: Ino, Master won't believe what Konohamaru just bought on a catalog

Konohamaru:Sakura you act like this thing is a curse...Jeez

Tsunade: Konohamaru...what's in the box...Bring it here. (He brings in the box to Tsunade to look inside.)

Konohamaru: You guys are overreacting! This is nothing.

(Tsunade looks inside it and sees the contents which make her push the box out of reflex.) Tsunade: What the hell is that thing?

Konohamaru:OH you gotta be kidding me. This is nothing I swear to you! What the hell is wrong with you girls seriously?

Tsunade: Konohamaru where did you get this?

Konohamaru: I ordered it from a catalog. What's the big deal?

Tsunade: Look kid I don't what you just showed me but there is no way and I mean NOW WAY that this...this...this THING is a toy...at least not in the sense you think it is.

Konohamaru: What? Looks it's even got a feature on it...Look check it out! (He put's his hand in the box and its starts vibrating.)

Hinata: Oh my god Konohamaru! Y-y-you said Naruto gave you the catalog for that thing?

Konohamaru: Look you guys don't believe ask him when he gets here. I know he's got some meeting with you right?

Tsunade:He is but I'll get him right back here! Oh that boy's got a lot to answer to!**  
**

(She get's her head out the window and yells like the devil himself to Naruto. Within a matter of seconds Naruto comes right through the very window she yelled out of and stands in frint of her.)

Naruto: Hey Gramma Tsunade what's the hubub?

Hinata:...uh...um..Hi Naruto!

Naruto: *Yeahwhatever*! So what's up?

Tsunade: Naruto look in that box here...Tell me what you see in there?

Naruto:That box?...what I don't see any- WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING?

Tsunade: I was hoping you'd tell me?

Naruto: What I didn't tell him to order the damn thing. I didn't read the catalog I just gave it to him. I didn't say "Hey check this thing out and see what you think!"

Konohamaru:Yeah you did boss...You even used those exact words on me yesterday.

Naruto:*NoIdidn't!***  
**

Konohamaru:Yes you did!

Naruto: I think you took this whole thing the wrong way.

(They all look at him, disappointment seen in their eyes)

Hinata: Naruto...how could you...I misjudged you Naruto!

Sakura: Naruto you know better

Ino: Yeah especially with little kids_._

Tsunade: How do you even sleep at night?

Hinata: Putting an innocent little boy into this kind of thing. I thought you had a heart Naruto. Now I see the true light. What's you've done is very shameful and If I was your mother I'd be so disappointed in you. This is obviously not a child's toy and you know it! For shame Naruto For shame!

Sakura: Yeah you blockhead Konohamaru is just a kid. How could you do this?

Naruto: What the fuck? Why me?

Hinata: Naruto do you even look at anything before you give it to a little kid?

Naruto: What? I scanned through it! It was dark?

Hinata: And you read in the dark? Naruto you'll hurt your eyes

Sakura: This is a new low even for you Naruto. I expected better.

Tsunade: I expected Jiraya or even Anko...but not you. If Kushina was here she'd be so ashamed

Naruto: Hey you leave my mom out of this! Why is everyone beating up on me? I didn't do anything wrong!

(Ino takes the box and puts it in his face)

Ino: You frikkin gave Konohamaru THIS Naruto Uzumaki...THIS this..this...whatever the fuck this piece of shit is. I am ashamed your even my friend. And you wanna be Hokage

Hinata: Not like this he's not (in thought) _I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry...But this is out of love Naruto...Please understand._

Naruto: Oh this is great I got the blond, pinky, Miss Identity crisis and stalker girl accusing me of being a bad influence.

Ino:Blond? Well that's the pot calling the kettle black

Tsunade:Identity crisis?

Hinata: Stalker girl?... (in thought)_ Could it be...does he know?_

Sakura:Excuse me?...Pinky?

Naruto:Yeah that's right I said it! You always tell Moegi those weird guy pick up lines..And you Ino are always messing with Udon just cause his name makes you hungry! And you Hinata for turning your sister into a clone just like you. Hanabi practically breaths down his neck.

Tsunade:...and what about me?

Naruto:You let me go with pervy sage...nuff said.

Konohamaru:ANYWAY...Boss tell 'em all the everyone really likes this new toy! Even Kiba's mom likes it. She doesn't stop about that little feature it has!

Naruto: Little feature? What little feature?

Tsunade: This (Flips the box open and puts her hand in it. The box then vibrates for about 3 seconds before she turns it off.)

Naruto: O_O...It vibrates?...

Ino:Well duh of course it vibrates...Won't be fun if it didn't!

Tsunade:...Ino do you have one?

Ino: No...

Naruto: Not what I needed to hear.

Hinata:Well what do we do with it?

Tsunade: Obviously this thing...Whatever it is this...this...vibrating contraption it needs to not be seen in your hands

Konohamaru: Aww come on it's not bad at all

Tsunade:Enough Konohamaru...That's the end of it...We're not gonna talk about this again...and Naruto...shame on you.

Hinata:Yes Naruto you need to be more careful. Who knows what Kurenai would think if her new nephew would go around town playing with that...that...thing.

Naruto:(rolls eyes) You know what...fuck you guys...I'm out of here! (Jumps out of the windows)

Tsunade:HEY YOU LITTLE PUNK GET OVER HERE! WHY DON'T YOU SAY THAT AGAIN! NARUTOOO!

Hinata: Uhh...I hope he's not too mad at us...I-I-I-I mean we were a little hard on him.

Sakura:bah fuck him! Let's go girls I say we hit up what little boutique I saw on the way over here..Make over anyone!

Konohamaru:Hey what about me?

Sakura:Go home...And get your money back...

Konohamaru: What? Man..This sucks...I don't know what the fuss was about...It's just a toy...sheesh you think it was a weapon of mass destruction or something

(Everyone leaves the room with the toy...The box if left open and what is seen inside is)

* * *

SOMETHING FOR YOU TO INTERPRET! Hah! See if that should make your brain tick!

Anyway that's it for this one shot! Have fun with it! until Then!

See ya next time! ^ ^. \m/


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